I’m reminded that early writing advice tells you to never reuse words—that sounds “clunky.” Always stay in the 3rd person unless you have an explicit reason for 1st—anything else is “amateurish”.
Well, balls to those rules! Second person mirroring phrases, words, and time made for fucking grotesque and sad poetry. Excellent job here sir!
Wow, this is amazing writing. Relentless, self-destructive pace, recurring images and ominous numbers. A truly great use of second-person--I couldn't see it written any other way. Great work.
This is just too good for it to be only read by us few here. Andy, honestly, I'm just actually speechless - was just shouting FUCK OFF at you within a few minutes (in a "with the most genuine respect" kind of way, you understand)
you and Jon - the bar is so high now I need to learn pole vault FFS.
This hit me straight in the feels. It’s gritty and dark, but damn if it doesn’t have so much depth and soul. And light and hope. I was in it. Felt like I lived it. Impressive.
Andy!!!!! Amazing writing. You pushed my face in the dirt with this one. Love the repetition, the pacing and somehow you pulled off second person. Well done
Dense, disgusting, dirty, diabolical, dark and depressingly delightful.
Danke 🙏
I’m reminded that early writing advice tells you to never reuse words—that sounds “clunky.” Always stay in the 3rd person unless you have an explicit reason for 1st—anything else is “amateurish”.
Well, balls to those rules! Second person mirroring phrases, words, and time made for fucking grotesque and sad poetry. Excellent job here sir!
That's bad advice, horrible “rules” and absolutely no one worth a damn follows them.
Thank you very much 🙏.
Fucking wild and beautiful, dark and brutal. Just perfect.
Thank you 🙏.
God, that was brutal and gorgeous and brutal. I can’t breathe. 🫡
Thank you 🙏.
Wow, this is amazing writing. Relentless, self-destructive pace, recurring images and ominous numbers. A truly great use of second-person--I couldn't see it written any other way. Great work.
Thank you very much 🙏. You are kind.
This is just too good for it to be only read by us few here. Andy, honestly, I'm just actually speechless - was just shouting FUCK OFF at you within a few minutes (in a "with the most genuine respect" kind of way, you understand)
you and Jon - the bar is so high now I need to learn pole vault FFS.
Thank you 🙏. You are kind.
you have got THE WORDS IN YOU my man. something in this totally freaked me out by the way - I will send you a message ...
When I got to this bit - I genuinely freaked out a bit.
"Eleven, eleven, Jasmine says. Hmm. Well, that can mean a lot of different things.
Like what?
It could mean that you've opened a door. A door that you can't close now."
I appreciate it. I'm glad that I could provide an experience. It's all I'm trying to do.
This hit me straight in the feels. It’s gritty and dark, but damn if it doesn’t have so much depth and soul. And light and hope. I was in it. Felt like I lived it. Impressive.
Thank you very much. 🙏 I am humbled.
Enjoyed that. Now off to the offie to buy a bottle of Nicolas II.
Thank you 🙏. 🤣
A thrilling, desperate skate along the razor's edge. It sliced right through me, this story. Phenomenal and humanly dark.
Thank you very much 🙏
this was so seamless and so incredibly well done, I didn’t even realize it was in second person until the last scene. how did you do that?
Thank you very much 🙏.
Second person is so rare! I so dig this! Thanks for sharing it, Andy!
Thank you 🙏.
Man that fucked me up. So good. Holy shit. I want that on paper. Damn.
Thank you very much 🙏.
I may never get over the baby and I can just smell that house. Ugh. Really amazing writing.
Thank you very much. 🙏
What a ride: you did such a good job of conveying the intensity and the gritty rawness of addiction.
Thank you 🙏.
Andy!!!!! Amazing writing. You pushed my face in the dirt with this one. Love the repetition, the pacing and somehow you pulled off second person. Well done
Thank you very much 🙏.
oooooh I love this - icky and intense
Thank you 🙏.